I don't have to be good enough for anyone.

Okay so I have avoided being truly honest on here for a while cause there are some people in my life who would love to take anything I say and make it horrible. I have avoided being real because people like to take real and destroy you. They will try and find any and everything they can to think that you are worse than you are. People spread rumors about real people.

But I have decided that I don't care anymore. Sure talk trash about me. Sure take my vulnerability and rub my short comings in my face. Do it. I dare you.

Cause I don't care anymore. I might care tomorrow, but I will read this again and I will find again that I don't care.
Why don't I care?

Because I don't have to be enough for anyone.
I do not have to be good enough for anyone.
I do not have to be a certain kind of person for any gosh darn stupid idiot that thinks I am not what I should be.

Yeah that was harsh but it is the truth.

I do not have to be anything for anyone.

I, me, Kiki, myself is good enough. As I am.
With all my failures.

I am good enough to marry Cody.
I am good enough to have a beautiful wedding day.
I am good enough to have the job that I have.
I am good enough to be apart of a new family.
I am good enough to have children with the man I love.
I am good enough to make whatever choices I freaking want.

I am good enough. I am more than good enough. I am super good enough. I am exceedingly more than enough. I am extremely more than enough. Why? Because God says I am. He says that this is my future and He says I am good enough to be in it.

So to all the haters, I say keep on hating. Just keep it up. Cause 10, 20, 30 years down the road I will be happy while you wallow in your miserable horrible life still. Why? Because I am enough, always and forever.

Me, plain ole me. Me who grew up in a beautiful small house with one bathroom. Me who did not grow up in a mansion. Me who has screwed up. Me who has made mistakes. Me who came from modest upbringing, me who doesn't have a million dollars. Me who wants to pay for her wedding with just her and her fiance, me who doesn't want or need help. Me who is not about putting on airs for people. Me who wants a small wedding and not a lot of people. Me who chooses to love a man in the military. Me who sometimes cries because being away from him is the hardest thing I have ever done. Me who is getting married quickly. Me who will no longer give excuses for her actions.

I refuse to explain myself to anyone anymore. Because those who love me don't mind and those who mind don't truly love me.

I don't have to have excuses or reasons why things are happening the way the are.
My explanation is from now on: That's how I want it.

Because I am enough. What I want is good enough. I am good enough to marry Cody. I am good enough to be happy for the rest of my life. I am more than enough for him, I am more than enough for me.

Bye, bye haters. I don't care anymore.

(Photo credit: Kenny Kerns Photography)